Girlfriends #9 Someday Soon

Our book begins with Natalie hanging out with Edan in his motel room- of course, no sexy time is to happen because I guess Edan and Nat will just never have sex- EVER!! UGH! Well, Nat drove an hour away- snuck out of the house, and took Cassandra’s prized BMW to go see Edan- and boy, once the Taylor family finds out Nat is in TROUBLE! Miriam, Cassandra’s mama, is sick and tired of Natalie constantly breaking rules in their house, and Miriam pretty much says this is the final straw and tells Natalie that she is calling Nat’s white mama in South Central, and Natalie is to go home to South Central IMMEDIATELY!! Somehow, without much explanation, Natalie pleads enough so that she is allowed to stay in Chandler, Washington, instead of having to go to South Central and be around all of that post LA riot crap. But, Miriam says that for Natalie to stay, Nat is going to have to work for Miriam at her real estate office every day after school- and horror of HORRORS that means less time for Nat to hang out with Edan- and, well, not fuck.

We then go to the laundromat, where Maria Torres works for her daddy, and a random Native American dude named Landau Swan ( yep that’s his name) who lives in a trailer or some such walks into the laundromat asking for a job. I guess he walked in there in Book 8 and Maria instantly fell in love with Landau and is convinced he is the love of her life. I am reading this wondering what the hell happened to her love jones for Simon Pearlstein- I guess that was explained in book 7 or 8 which I do not own and do not see a way of getting. Maybe Simon turned homo I have no idea. But Simon’s homo-ness was never discussed in Book 9, and if he were gay it’d be discussed a LOT- that is just how the Girlfriends series is. Any differences are discussed a LOT.


Stephanie’s sis, Ana, aka the juvenile delinquent was caught shoplifting. Mrs. Ling chooses not to do shit about it, so Steph has to bail Ana out of jail, and then Ana and Steph have this really odd convo about every sex myth one can think of- basically Ana says things like ” Oh my friend says it doesn’t feel good to a guy with a condom” and Steph tells Ana that she best makes a dude wear a condom if she ever has sex, and she best be in love before doing it- well what is good about this series is that Stephanie had fucked her now dead boyfriend, Philip, but she was wicked in love with him, and it is good that the book also says just because you screw one man doesn’t mean you have to screw em all- well at 17 that’s a great message. Since I am 30 I say just fuck em all!!!! 🙂


Cass is apparently now allowed to see Faizon in his house, and she is a little miffed that Faizon is the assistant in her ballet class when she wanted that job, and now Faizon works 2 jobs so they can barely see each other- and they do fuck so that’s gotta hurt. Now the back of the book says, ” Nevill, Faizon’s bro, wants Cassandra to help him out a jam” and ummm that sooooo never fuckin happens!!

Janis starts a Feed the Animals campaign. She basically visits every restaurant kitchen in Chandler, makes them give her all of their leftovers, and pretty much spills the food all over the pavement for the cats to eat. Kinda fuckin nasty. Cass is helping Janis with this project for some bizarre ass reason, and toward the end they are in a rather bad neighborhood feeding the lovely strays. So then these 3 random fucks from Faizon’s old digs ( the homeless shelter) attempt to rob and attack Cass and Janis, and Nevill is there and scares the dudes off. So didn’t NEVILL help CASS out of a jam?? But then Cass knows that Nevill is back, and she does not tell Faizon b/c of Nevill’s bad past or whatever, but Janis thinks Nevill is bitchin and wants to tell the whole world that Nevill is back!!!!

The little girl, Hope, that Nat bonds with at Harmony House ( naturally they bond b/c both are biracial and unwanted) wants to have Nat take her to the carnival that is going on at the end of this special book, and Nat is like Sure Hopie I will take ya! But then EDAN asks too, and Nat and Edan barely spend time together. So Nat is in a total jam- but then Edan says they can take Hope along, too and all three of them can be happy together as a lovely family!! Yes, a lovely family with a “mom” and ” dad” who never fuck.

Stephanie finally asks if her gay daddy can come over for dinner and finally see Corinne and Ana, especially since Ana has asked her dad to move to San Francisco and be around awesome gay values- WOOOO!!! And Mrs. Ling is not super OK with that but she is mad uninvolved so you know Ana will get her way. Well, Steph’s man ( and I really don’t get why they are together) does not like that Steph’s dad is gay, and he has been getting kinda cozy with some distant cousin that he dated a long time ago, and Stephanie tells Joey they can cool things off for awhile b/c she is just not cool with that.


So in the end, Stephanie, her parents and her sisters are having the most emotional, awesome family dinner EVER and Joey stops by the house and finally can accept Steph’s gay daddy, so all is now right in the world of Steph and Joey- like I give a shit. Hope is all happy getting to ride the elephant at the carnival with Edan and Natalie and they are all cozy. And no I have yet to describe how Maria finally gets to talk to Landau, her one true love, and he reveals that he is MARRIED- and has a CHILD!!!!!!!!!! They are both back in South Dakota and he is working at the laundry to support the fam I guess. So at the end, Landau asks Maria to ride the carousel, and she says ” no because you are married”- not sure what one has to do with the other but whatevs. And then Landau SMILES  and this is supposed to mean something big. ummm OK!!!!! And Janis sees Nevill at the carnival and is mad excited and then tells Faizon ” Oh didn’t Cass tell you he saved our lives? “and no DUH Janis Cass pretty much told you to keep your stupid white ass shut and you fuckin didn’t so now Faizon is going to be all pissed off at Cass because you are a loudmouth! God Janis is soooo much more annoying than I realized!!


Overall, this Girlfriends book was the worst one I have read. I can really see why the series didn’t last long after this reading this junk because it was just fuckin dumb- it pretty much turned into a bad soap opera- like ” Passions” or something. What a disappointment! Though I would be curious to see what happened in Book 10- like if Maria and Landau FUCKED!


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