SVU # 16- The Other Woman

First of all cover comments- The man in the picture, who one assumes is supposed to be Louis Miles, looks like a total nerd. He actually sort of reminds me of a former coworker, but looks older and more nerdy ( or is it nerdier?), sadly!! And Jessica has a really odd expression on her face- I think she is supposed to look as if she is ” in love” but if you ask me, she just looks constipated!!

 Photobucket

Well there are about 4 plots going on in this particular book, so bear with me. Our book starts with Jessica and Louis ( who is her mythology prof, though he also appears to be  a TA in Physics? I don’t remember Classics and Physics EVER going together!!) are locked in a heated embrace in Louis’s car. Louis and Jessica make out a little, and Louis tells Jess that no one can know about the relationship because he may lose his job but Louis is thinking ( as we are always inside of Louis’s head throughout this novel) that Jessica is the sexiest young woman he has ever seen ( of course! She’s a Wakefield) and she’s so goddamn desirable but shit- she’s a student he’s a teacher! Jessica is just so upset that this relationship has to be kept secret but she understands it’s because of his job- and she will do whatever it takes to keep her man!!! See, Jessica has never been more in love with anyone in her life- not even her ex husband ( see, this is the first Sweet Valley University book I have ever read, and I had no idea Jessica had already been divorced at the age of 18!) or the man she hooked up with soon after the divorce who had tried to rape her ( that part did not shock me- Jess has been ” almost raped about 137 times!) and Jessica is just aching with desire and love for dear, nerdy looking according to the cover Louis. Louis drops her off at her dorm soon after the make-out sesh ends, and Jessica is filled with agony and ectasy as you can guess.

We then cut to a scene where Winston Egbert is in his dorm ( remember him from SVH? That funny, dorky and kind of boring dude? Or well he was supposed to be funny but never was) wondering whether or not he should actually use the answers he ganked from Louis’s office ( Jessica had left the door open after getting out of Louis’s office and then Winston took advantage, or so it seems) to cheat on his upcoming physics exam. See, Winston is failing physics, and his father has threatened to make Winston pull out of SVU and go to a smaller school if he does badly in any subject.  But Winston cannot bear to leave SVU- and his girlfriend Denise ( who is also Jess’s Theta sorority sister), who is Win’s love of his life! And Denise barely needs to study and gets good grades but Winston is not like that, and Denise will just not understand if Win fails physics! So what to do, Winston, what to DO??????

Cut to the next scene- Todd and Elizabeth ( yes Todd Wilkins!) have joined forces to work on a story that Liz is writing for the student TV station or whatever.  Todd and Liz are at someone named Daryl’s house, and Daryl is totally kicking Todd’s ass at one to one basketball.  But Todd and Elizabeth are really there to ask about a point shaving scandal that they believe is occuring at good ol’ SVU. Now Liz has cracked stories about bad shit going on in the SVU athletics dept before, and apparently in a previous book one of Liz’s stories got Todd Wilkins and some dude Mark kicked off the basketball for taking special gifts for playing basketball! Darn you, Liz!!!! Truthfully, this whole ” making basketball players throw the game” shit is not really drawing me in whatsoever- but what gets me sooo upset is that Todd and Liz are not even together anymore! Liz is dating some dude Tom Watts who is head of the SVU TV station- now Tom spends this book in Vegas trying to work on getting an ESPN like station started- the station would cover NCAA teams only, and it would be student run! Kinda a cool concept, in a way. And Todd is dating an Asian woman- I guess interracial dating is allowed at SVU- named Gin Yung who is ALSO a journalist- journalism must get Todd hot.

Well Daryl is refusing to answer any questions and is getting ticked the fuck off, and Liz and Todd think they know why- Daryl’s younger sister walks in, and she has braces on her legs! Daryl alludes to the fact that the basketball team is now ” taking care” of his family, and he gets pissed off  and won’t talk and Liz and Todd leave.

 

In story #4, ( God I HATE that there are soooo many plots!!) we learn that Lila Fowler and Bruce Patman are moving into a sweet beachfront condo together! Yes, Lila and Bruce are sooo a couple which I think is cool! Now some backstory- Lila was apparently MARRIED to an Italian count who died in some plane crash! Yes, Lila AND Jess are both 18 year old divorcees! WTF???????? Jessica is helping Li and Bruce move, and Jess sees Louis in his neighboring condo, on his balcony, and some chick has his arms around him! Who the hell is the bitch with Louis? And awww Li and Bruce are TOTAL in love and are so excited to be living together. BUT-the real estate agent arrives, and she announces that their check has bounced!!!! WTF? Lila and Bruce are sooo totally millionaires! But for some reason Li’s late hubby’s cash is all tied up in Italian banks or some bullshit of that nature, and Lila’s dad has pretty much cut Lila out of his life because she is with Bruce. Well, Bruce thinks A-HA- I will call the guy running my trust, Uncle Dan! Uncle Dan says there is no way in hell he is financing Bruce living with Lila because his frat house is paid for and he can live at the frat- if Bruce wants to live with that ho Lila ( well Uncle Dan didn’t say ho but whatevs) then Bruce is on his fuckin own!

Well now that Li and Bruce are looking at very limited funds and no condo, the happy couple has to find an afforable place to live. All they can find is a very shabby house with a very white- trash landlady, and the 3rd floor apartment is utter crap- no phone service, the plumbing is all fucked up, the ceiling leaks, you name it! The place is utter shit. But it’s all the loving twosome can afford, and of course in the course of the book all kinds of crazy crap ensues in this shit apartment, and Lila and Bruce argue a lot, blah blah blah. Frankly, once I was all HOORAY about Li and Bruce being in love, I didn’t really care about this plot point- it got really boring really quickly and not much happens anyway other than Lila and Bruce bickering over their shithole apartment and what not. So I move on.

So Todd and Liz finagle a meeting with the head of the Alumni Association, Mr. Santos ( who actually is not an actual SVU alum but whatevs- yeah he has a ” honorary” degree not sure how he managed that shit) and Mr. Santos pretty much tells Todd and Liz to stop investigating the point shaving scandal. Naturally, Todd and Liz aren’t going to listen to that bullshit and they keep asking questions- and no one is talking. Meanwhile, Toms Watts call Gin-Yung and tells her, to, like, make sure that Liz is writing the feel good athlete story she was ordered to write, and Gin-Yung claims to know nothing about what Todd and Liz are working on- which of course is so not true. Not sure why Tom is so invested in making sure Liz is writing ” what she is supposed to”- frankly I feel that we will find out that Tom is a total snake in the grass. But we don’t find that out in this book.

OK now back to Mr. Winston. Winston decides he is going to cheat, although he is feeling very guilty over this. Winston ends up getting an A on the Physics final, and Prof Stark calls Winston into his office soon after the tests are graded, Stark is like ” OK dude you were almost failing my course, barely cared about Physics, never picked up my study guides so what the fuck? How did you get an A? ” and basically Winston has to confess that he cheated. Later, when Winston and Denise are out somewhere, Winston is so upset and guilty and what not that Win confesses to Denise that he cheated on the test, Prof Stark is gonna talk to Win’s parents, and he may get expelled for this. Denise FLIPS THE FUCK OUT!!! She says she can’t trust Winston again blah blah blah. Now, I know cheating on an exam is wrong, but God Denise it’s not as if Winston cheated on ya with a Wakefield twin, OK? Settle down, girl!

Now, Todd and Liz are trying to get this dude Mark who was also kicked off the team to investigate what is going on with the basketball team, but Mark gets a better deal- basically Mr. Santos bribes Mark into not investigating by giving him a job as the coach’s assistant, and of course if Mark does this well maybe he can get back on the team. And Mark is a sucker so he will take the job.  And still no one is talking.  Honestly, this point shaving shit is also BORING!!!!! Can I just say again that WAY too many plots are happening here? This is fuckin insane!!

So yeah back to Jess and Louis. Jess confronts Louis about the babe in the condo ( after she spends about 2 days in bed until Liz yells at her) and Louis says she is really no one important, Jess is who is important, he loves her to death, and Jessica spends the night with Louis in his arms making out a lot and one assumes they also fucked a lot. After all, since Jess has had her cherry popped by the ex hubster, I am assuming sex is now OK.  Bow chicka wow wow!!

 

Liz asks Jess where she was the night before, and Jess says it was with a guy but Liz does not know it was the professor, of course. None of her friends can know- not Liz, not Jessie’s new bestie, Isabella- yeah Jess has a new bestie- it’s not Lila anymore! WTF????? And all of Jess’s sorority sisters think Louis soooo sexy- but only Jess can fuck him, ladies! So fuck ya all!

Well, back to Winston again.  The school was going to let Winston get off rather easily as it was a first offense, but father Egbert is not cool with that at all. He wants a harsh punishment and demands that Winston join the ROTC on campus to ” be all that he can be!” Winston is so bummed over the very thought of this and ends up telling Denise he stuck joining ROTC on one of the many voicemails he leaves her- and ooooh twist- when Winston shows up to ROTC guess who has ALSO joined to keep Win company? DENISE!!!! So they can suffer together! SHA LA LA LA!!!!

So Dr. Beal, head of the athletics association, calls a meeting with Todd and Liz. He tells Elizabeth to stop her investigating or he will reveal the many photos taken of Jess and Louis together at his condo ( any X rated ones? They don’t even SAY!) and of course this means Louis would lose his job. And, uh, yeah since Jess left that door open for ol’ Winston to get the exam, that means she helped Win cheat, right? Soooo… they could expell Jessica of course, And does Liz REALLY want that to happen to her own dear twin sissy? Methinks NOT! So Liz is sooo very torn over what to do at this point.

Meanwhile, Jessica is at Louis’s again and has to leave in the middle of a huge rainstorm.  All of a sudden, Jessica notices a car keeps following her and is literally trying to run her off the road!!!! And the person in the car almost succeeds- Jessica has to make all types of U turns and almost kill herself to get away from this maniac! And the maniac- Louis’s WIFE! Yes WIFE! Louis was or is apparently married to a psychotic bitch! And oh, the ex wife calls Louis from her car saying ” I want you to hear this all go on” and Louis hears a crunch, and freaks the fuck out yelling ” JESSICA!!”

 

But Jessica, again, did manage to get away and she notices a beautiful curly haired brunette in a black dress going up to her and Jess is all ” Who the fuck are you?” and the woman proceeds to pretty much tell Jessica ” Louis is my hubby and stay the FUCK away!” And the book ends.

 

God, I had NEVER read Sweet Valley University before I read this book and these books are even more poorly written than Sweet Valley High or Twins!!! This book SUCKED it BIG TIME!!! And FOUR seperate plots in one book? How ridiculous is that! Though, OK, I would love to read Book #17 to see what is up with this wifey of Louis’s and what the hell will go on as to me the Lou/ Jess plot is the only one worth caring about. And I also think that maybe Tom will be exposed for the asshole that I know he is, and Gin Yung can find her a nice Asian man and then Todd and Lizzie can get BACK TOGETHER!! WOOOOOOOOOOO

Advertisements

2 Responses to “SVU # 16- The Other Woman”

  1. Jan, do Jess and Liz, like, live together in these books? Or does Jess live in the sorority house?

  2. girltalkread Says:

    Yes Liz and Jessie live together in a dorm.
    And oh I mistakenly said that both Jess and Lila are divorced- I am wrong. Jessica is divorced, and Lila is an 18 year old widow! But still- how many divorcees and widows did you know in college?

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: