Matchmaker, Matchmaker, Make Me a Match

… find me a find, catch me a catch… now before you get excited, I will NOT be recapping ” Keep Out Claudia!!” As promised, I will be recapping Girl Talk #27, Perfect Match- we haven’t done Girl Talk recaps in awhile so one hopes you enjoy!

The girls are at Fitzie’s, and their computer teacher Mr. Young will apparently tell them about a new project that will be worth 50 percent of their final semester grade, and Sabrina wonders what kind of project could be that much of a big deal.  Scottie Silver then goes over to the table, and Katie is all nervous- she sort of likes him from when they played hockey together, and when Sabrina offers Scottie the seat next to Katie, Katie is all flustered and nervous, even though she can act normally around him when they are playing hockey.  All of a sudden, a french fry gets thrown at Katie’s table, and it turns out that Greg Loggins threw the french fry. Greg is this boy who is always annoying Katie- he makes weird noises when she walks by, or try to trip her.  Sabrina, Randy and Allison all tell Katie that Greg is probably acting like a jerk because he likes her- ah remember middle school love?  And Scottie listens to that, and looks pissed off.  Katie thinks to herself that boys are really weird sometimes.

In computer class, Katie describes how Mr. Young looks like a total nerd with a pocket protector, and he has a very dull, montone voice.  Finally Mr. Young announces what the big assignment will be.  The kids have to create their own computer program- just as Sabrina had feared.  The class has to divide themselves into groups, come up with a flowchart, and then the flowchart will be translated into a computer program.  Katie is working with Sabs, Allison and Randy of course. And Sabrina’s bro Sam is in a group with that kid Arizonna who is featured in Little Drummer Girl ( see my sister’s post on that one for more info on Arizonna), Nick Robbins, Jason McKee, and Greg Loggins, and annoying Stacy Hansen is in a group with her friends Eva and and Laurel, and the class nerd Winslow Barton, who Stacy pretty much runs to because Winslow knows more about computers than anyone else in the class.  As Katie, Allison, Randy and Sabs are discussing their project, Greg goes up to them and is ” all you girls will get an F because we dudes are coming up with awesome ideas.” 

The gals gather at Sabrina’s house that evening to come up with an idea for a computer program. Based on a quiz Sabrina sees in a magazine, the gals decide to do a computer dating program. One has to wonder if any real middle school would allow this.  Sabrina says that the class can compare answers that the girls and the guys would give to a quiz, and based on those answers the class would find out who is paired with who.  The questions the gals come up with have to do with interests and hobbies.  The questions have only A and B answers- eg Do you prefer that your mate does well in school? and questions of that nature. The ladies all think they will definitely have the most interesting project in class!

In class, kids like Stacy and Greg Loggins are saying what a lame idea Katie and clan’s project is, and Sabs says ” we’ll see who’s laughing when we get an A”. Sabs rocks! And then Mr. Young says ( again don’t see this happening) that he thinks a computer dating project is a great idea.  Mr. Young then says that he will have the computer match the entire class, and then to see if the computer is right, the class will go on a big group date as “matches.” Again, the school would allow this? In 7 th grade? And since there is an uneven number of boys and girls, Mr. Young will also take the quiz- OK, Mr. Young, dude, is this an excuse to feel up a 13 year old? ( I know my mind is in el gutter)

After school, Katie has the other girls go to her new mansion for dinner. See, much like Kristy Thomas, Katie mom married a millionaire named Jean Paul, and Katie got a new stepbrother named Michel aas well. Katie has a cook and housekeepers and all that, though, and Katie even calls the cook ” Cook”( which I find fuckin stupid- I mean she couldn’t call the cook ” Mrs Jones” or whatever?) and she makes three more pieces of chicken for Al, Randy and Sabs to have for dinner. 

Katie and her gal pals go out to skate in the pond, and Michel is out skating with his boy posse, which includes Sabrina’s bro Sam and Greg Loggins. The kids all trip over each other, and right as Katie is going to fall, Greg Loggins keeps Katie from falling!  But Scottie is there, and Scottie is all pissy saying Katie never “just falls”- as if to say Katie fell on purpose to have Greg rescue her.  Katie wonders why Scottie, who is usually so nice, is acting like such a jerk, and Greg, who is usually an asshat to Katie, is acting so sweet.

The next chapter mostly deals with the steps the girls are taking to finish their project. They are all finding this project complicated, and they call Winslow Barton for some help- Randy is pretty good friends with Winslow.  Randy is laughing when she gets off the phone with Winslow- Winslow said that ever since he completed the flowchart, Stacy and Eva have been really mean to Winslow so in revenge he told Stacy and Eva  to go outside to draw every star in the sky because he needed pictures drawn of each star- so they are out in the cold drawing stars! Winslow felt bad asking Laurel to do the same ( read my post “Peer Pressure” and learn about how Laurel is the coolest one of Stacy’s gang) but Stacy made Laurel stay outside with Eva and Stacy- God Stacy is a worse bitch than Jessica Wakefield if you ask me!

It’s the day where the class takes their questionnaires to see who they will all be matched up with in the class. Stacy keeps trying to copy Nick’s answers to the test since I guess Stacy has a major crush on Nick. Sabs is none too happy about that, because Sabrina actually likes Nick too.  Nick then shifts in his seat so Stacy can’t see his answers.  And now the fun begins- who got matched with who???? Randy gets matched with Arizonna- which Katie feels makes senses as Randy and Arizonna both like music and skateboarding, and they are friends.  Match #2- Allison and Jason. Apparently, both of them are pretty shy and smart. Match made in heaven.  Poor Sabrina is matched with Mr. Young!!! Oh no Mr. Young is gonna feel up my Sabs?  But Match #4 is- Stacy and Winslow!! HAH HAH Stacy the bitch you were matched with El Nerdo!  The next matches are Laurel and Nick, ( God I bet Stacy is steamed) and Sam and Eva- and Sam can’t stand Eva and calls Eva ” Jaws” because of her braces.  And so Katie is with- Greg. Katie is none too happy about this pairing.  Sabrina is bummed about getting Mr. Young for a match, and Katie thinks how Greg is the last dude she wanted to be paired with in class- gee Katie at least it’s not some 35 year old teacher!  Sabs, Allison and Randy tell Katie again that they are convinced Greg likes Katie, and she does not want to hear it! Then Stacy starts getting all bitchy with our gang, saying that the gals rigged the test.  Then Randy finds out how Stacy really got Winslow as a match- Winslow saw Stacy trying to matchwith Nick, so he copied all of Stacy’s answers exactly so that Stacy would get matched with Winslow instead, just to piss Stacy off! Ya know Winslow is a way cool class nerd.

The next day, Scottie goes to Katie’s locker, and asks Katie about the project, and Katie said she’s happy with it, and Scottie goes off being all ” Oh I am glad you are so happy I am sure you all” all bitchy about life as Scottie tends to get.  Katie has no idea why Scottie is being so mean to her.  At lunch, Allison said that it seems everyone is looking at and whispering about Katie, and everyone is also teasing Greg, but the gals don’t get what the guys teasing Greg has to do with Katie.  Then- Katie notices that Scottie is sitting with Stacy- and Stacy is flirting with Scottie like mad- shit, Stacy is VERY Jessica Wakefield- or Amy Sutton circa SVH- liking one dude one day, and one guy the next!  Katie is really hurt and pissed, because she thought Scottie liked her, and Katie likes him.

Telephone Talk-  Sabs calls Randy and tells her that Sam said that everyone is saying that Katie rigged the computer program to match up with Greg, because Katie secretly likes Greg. Of course, Sabs and Randy figure that Stacy the cunt is behind that rumor.  Then, Randy tells Allison she heard Stacy telling Eva that Stacy has a date with Scottie after the group date tomorrow- ugh I hate Stacy- and Stacy is saying she and Scottie are boyfriend and girlfriend.  Also, Allison tells Sam that Katie does not like Greg, and Stacy is just spreading rumors. And so then Allison calls Katie to tell her what is going on…

At the mall the next day ( aka the day of the big date) Katie’s sis Emily drops Katie off, and she runs into Scottie and his boys and Scottie gives Katie a nasty look. Then when Katie meets Sabs, Randy and Allison, Sabs says that Stacy was trying to hang around Scottie and flirt with him, and Scottie totally ignored Stacy- HAH HAH Scottie told Stacy he wanted to hang with the dudes.  Sabs said it proves that Scottie is only talking to Stacy because he is jealous of Greg, and Randy rightfully points out that Scottie is being a dick regardless.  Then the gals discuss tonight’s big date- Sabs is still pissed over being matched with Mr. Young, of course Katie is dreading a date with Greg, but Allison and Randy are looking forward to their evenings with Jason and Arizonna, respectively.

At the movie date that night, Mr. Young assigns seats, and Katie is sitting between Sabrina and Greg. The date is all awkward at first between Greg and Katie, and Greg keeps fidgeting. But Sabs and Mr. Young are getting along and talking a mile a minute about astronomy and astrology! Katie can’t believe it!  And then, Katie notices that Greg is acting like a gentleman and she is shocked that a boy who seemed so jerky is acting normal.  Greg and Katie discuss the movie afterward, and agree that the older version of the movie they saw ( I guess the class went to see the new version) was better, but the new version had good points.  Then, Katie says she is sorry about the rumor, and Greg seems upset too because he says he never had a girl like him before- awwwww 😦  Katie says maybe girls don’t like him because of how he acts, and Greg says that his mom died when he was young, and his dad is often in his own world, so Greg acts jerky to get attention.  Katie then tells Greg she had fun on the date and is glad to get to know him better.  The gals and their dudes get together at Fitzie’s, and are all having quite a ball.  Scottie is sitting at a corner booth at Fitzie’s, glowering.   As Scottie sees Katie have fun with Greg, he goes over to flirt with friggin Stacy again.  Katie is all upset, and Katie and the other gals go to the bathroom to chat,and Katie admits she likes Scottie, and Randy said that Scottie may not know that, and Katie has to tell him so Katie decides she has to take the bull by the horns and tell Scottie her feelings. 

So when Scottie comes over the house to skate with Michel the next day, Katie tells Scottie that Greg is definitely not her boyfriend at all, and Katie does not even WANT a boyfriend- but if she did she knows exactly who she’d want to be her boyfriend-Scottie! Scottie says he knows Katie doesn’t want a serious thing right now, but would Katie go on  some dates with him at times?  Katie says most definitely, and Katie, Michel and Scottie go off to skate. The End.

So- we learned that Stacy Hansen is well- I will say she is the Amy Sutton of Girl Talk, as in Amy from SVH- because I think Amy is an even bigger hobag than Jessica in SVH. And Winslow is the Winston Egbert, I think, only Winslow is way fuckin cooler than Winston- and to me, isn’t Screech Powers from Saved by the Bell soooo Winston? They are both nerdy class clown types who hang out with the popular kids and no one is sure why!

I am going to try to be very ambitious and write a post tomorrow but with promises of 80 degree weather that may not happen- but in the next few weeks look forward to some more Girl Talk, a Fabulous Five book, Jessica the Thief ( a Sweet Valley Twins book and one of my favorites!) Hello, Mallory and some Freshman Dorm!

Happy weekend!

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